In the words of one of my favorite poets, Langston Hughes, “Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.” And when ‘life is lifing’ and I am experiencing challenging times, I find it absolutely vital for me to slow down, be patient with myself, and extend grace. During heightened emotional states, stress is a natural human response, but I try to focus on regulating my nervous system. I’ve learned from years of navigating my emotions during stressful situations that the best coping mechanism that works for me is self-care. This may seem like a simple solution, but it’s been pivotal in helping me recenter and regain inner peace.
The caveat to self-care is that it’s not a one-time thing; it is a regimented daily practice that instills daily check-ins with yourself that focuses on grounding, healing, and self-assessment. It is the act of being intentional with oneself, and with the daily responsibilities of work, school, finances, family, relationships, and more, it’s easy to prioritize everything and everyone else before yourself. If you’ve ever been so busy throughout the day, running errands, completing tasks, attending appointments, that by the end of the day, you’re drained and haven’t enough energy to do anything you planned for yourself, you are not alone.
But guess what! I’ve learned the importance of time management and proper planning, which makes executing my daily self-care regimen easier. I am my biggest investment, and my health and well-being are the priority. It’s like when the flight attendant says: “In case of an emergency, put your mask on first before attempting to help others”–it means the more I show up for myself, the more I am able to show up for others.
And this doesn’t have to be a daunting task; self-care activities should be integrated into everyone’s daily routines throughout the morning, afternoon, and evening. In fact, the goal is to create a practical daily routine that incorporates self-care practices to uphold one’s overall health and well-being throughout the day, curated and tailored to fit a person’s individual needs. By creating a daily routine and implementing self-care practices, I aim to feel like I’ve taken care of my personal responsibilities while still nurturing myself. This is an act of self-love. No longer am I the sacrificial lamb in my own life; I am the captain of my own ship, steering towards fulfillment and well-being.
Does this guarantee that I’ll never be stressed again or become overwhelmed during difficult times or situations? No, absolutely not. It does however, assure that I am equipped with the necessary tools to better handle stress. I am able to hold space for myself, recenter and realign, which reduces the impact of stress from becoming mentally, emotionally, or physically debilitating for me. By consistently prioritizing self-care, I am building a stronger foundation for managing stress effectively when it arises.
According to a 2022 study by the World Health Organization, young people and women in the USA have been disproportionately affected by stress since the onset of COVID-19, leading to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and self-harm. The American Psychological Association reported that in 2023, more individuals aged 35 to 44 reported chronic conditions—58% compared to 48% in 2019. Mental health diagnoses in this age group also increased significantly, rising from 31% in 2019 to 45% in 2023. Another factor is the link between lack of sleep and stress, which affects 57% of the American adult population, as noted in a 2024 Gallup poll. These statistics are eye-opening, and as someone who falls into a few of these statistical categories, it confirms the importance of taking care of myself––mind, body, and soul.
To get started, I focused on self-care practices based on my personal preferences and lifestyle. The key is to choose at least one practice for each category that works best for you. The table below is an example of self-care categories, practices, and the benefits they provide. It’s a template to help you get going, but if you’ve already created a routine that works for you, and there’s another action that you didn’t think of, maybe you can add it to your self-care regimen.
SELF-CARE TABLE
| SELF-CARE CATEGORIES | BENEFITS |
|---|---|
Physical Self-Care Photo by Boxed Water Is Better on Unsplash | 1. Exercise: Regular physical activity helps maintain fitness, reduces stress, and improves mood. Or, low impact exercise like walking, that can improve cardiovascular health, help maintain a healthy weight, and enhance overall fitness. 2. Nutrition: Eating a balanced diet provides essential nutrients for energy and overall health. 3. Sleep: Adequate rest is crucial for physical and mental recovery. |
Emotional Self-Care Photo by Nubelson Fernandes on Unsplash | 1. Journaling: Writing down thoughts and feelings can help process emotions. 2. Therapy or Counseling: Seeking professional help for emotional support and guidance. 3. Setting Boundaries: Establishing limits in relationships and work to prevent emotional exhaustion. |
Mental Self-Care Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash | 1. Mindfulness and Meditation: Practices that promote awareness and relaxation. 2. Learning and Growth: Engaging in hobbies, reading, or courses to stimulate the mind. 3. Time Management: Organizing tasks to reduce stress and increase productivity. |
Social Self-Care Photo by Andra C Taylor Jr on Unsplash | 1. Socializing: Spending time with supportive friends and family members. 2. Support Networks: Connecting with communities or groups that share common interests or experiences. 3. Communication: Expressing feelings and needs in relationships. |
Spiritual Self-Care Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash | 1. Prayer: Participating in prayer or other religious rituals to seek guidance, express gratitude, or connect with a higher power. 2. Meditation: Practices that promote inner peace and spiritual connection. 3. Breathwork: Practicing deep breathing exercises or other forms of breathwork to center yourself and promote relaxation and inner peace. 4. Nature and Solitude: Spending time in natural surroundings or alone for rejuvenation. |
Consistency is key, and these steady actions have been shown to produce positive long-term effects. I hope they lead to a long, healthy life—being active, happy, and enjoying myself well into my late 90s and 100s, much like the lovely citizens living in Blue Zones. A Blue Zone is a region in the world where people live significantly longer and healthier lives than average. This term was coined by Dan Buettner, a National Geographic Fellow and author, who identified five regions with the highest concentrations of centenarians (people who live to 100 years or more). Buettner’s documentary, Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones, was released on Netflix on August 30, 2023. The inhabitants of Blue Zones emphasize the importance of staying active through activities such as gardening, meditation, and walking. They also prioritize nutritious eating: whole foods, healthy fats, whole grains, seafood, pasta, and even fresh wine. Additionally, they balance work and family time by socializing with loved ones and practicing their religious/spiritual faith.
BLUE ZONES
- Ikaria, Greece: An island where people have lower rates of heart disease, cancer, and dementia.
- Okinawa, Japan: Known for the longevity of its inhabitants, who have among the longest disability-free life expectancy in the world.
- Sardinia, Italy: Specifically the mountainous region of Barbagia, a significant proportion of the population lives beyond 100 years.
- Nicoya Peninsula, Costa Rica: Noted for its high concentration of centenarians and low rates of middle-age mortality.
- Loma Linda, California, USA: It’s not a region but rather a community known for its large Seventh-day Adventist population, who live 10 years longer than the American average, attributed to a high percentage adopting a vegan or vegetarian lifestyle.
Every day I am grateful to be alive, and I want to live my best quality of life possible, and on this journey called, life, I intend on making it beautiful. The self-love that I pour into myself by taking the time to implement a daily routine that allows me to honor my body, strengthen my mind, align my spirit, and hold space for those that I love, by creating a healthy space for myself, through intention and action is invaluable. So, when I say, “self-love is a regimen,” I mean, I show up for myself every day because I love me; I love my life! It doesn’t mean there won’t be stressful, busy, or draining days; it means I show up for myself in spite of it, and when those days arise, I have the tools to handle myself with care.
It’s my hope that we all can take these nuggets and apply them to our day-to-day lives, and be blessed with the gift of 100 or more years of learning, healing, growing, and happily living.
